parenting adviceTag

Listen to Your Gut

Did you know that you have a second brain? Yeah, it’s in your gut. You might feel nauseous before making a big decision; that’s your gut telling you you’re stressed. You might feel like you have a knot in your stomach after you did something you knew was wrong; that’s your gut holding you accountable. You might feel flutters when you get into a heated debate; that’s your gut reminding you that you have limits. Here’s what PsychologyToday…

Holding Yourself Accountable is Not the Same as Beating Yourself Up

Reading even one of my blog posts you’d pick up on the fact that I hold personal responsibility as a significant virtue. If we don’t hold ourselves and our family members accountable for our actions, then our chances for having a happy healthy functioning family significantly decreases. Recently I found myself indulging in the great injustice of beating myself up instead of holding myself accountable. I say indulging because our minds trick us into thinking that this mental…

Finding the Balance

I am fascinated with how people deal with their children. I find myself observing parents at grocery stores, play grounds, and other places. I actually get lost like a child does when they see something that makes their wheels turn. You know when your child is doing something and you are trying to talk to them but they can’t hear a word you are saying because they are so entrenched in what they are seeing. That’s me when…

Quick Critical Thinking Exercise

Sometimes we are struggling to communicate with our children and we don’t have time to read a 1,352 word article on how to verbally go through the next conversation. Sometimes we are so mentally drained from struggling to have the verbal conversation that we fear moving forward. I get it. I’ve been there. I’m not a unicorn. I didn’t magically transform from a parent unable to handle simple problems into a perfectly patient parent who can handle anything….

To the Parents Who Do it All (Part 1)

It has become a terrible trend to take pride in being the lazy parent. When did this happen? When I was a kid, you did not want to be the parent who didn’t, at least, try to do it all. I know that the previous generation of parents had their own set of problems, and I’ve discussed those problems. They either didn’t do some of the things I am about to rattle off or they tried to hide…

Why Spanking Doesn’t Teach The Difference Between Right and Wrong

I wholeheartedly believe that the majority of parents that spank do so because they lack knowledge, patience and tolerance for disrespect, which is good. I believe that parents misunderstand the nature of their child’s behavior to be a personal attack. When in all actuality, it is their individuality struggling to emerge and develop. Spanking only speaks of our limits as parents, not their limits as children. I do not believe most parents spank in order to cause the harm…

Honest Confessions of an Imperfect Parent

I am the first to admit that I am not a perfect parent. I genuinely have no concept of what that would even mean. I vaguely discuss how I wasn’t always a peaceful parent in About Peace of Cake Parenting. What I couldn’t possibly portray on that one page was: How many times I experience defeat. How I am unsure if the bad habits that were hardwired into me as a child will ever be completely gone or…

How You Lose Authority When You Spank

Push back against anyone who is anti-spanking is inevitable considering a majority of parents in America still spank their children. “In 2014, according to a nationally representative survey, 76 percent of men, and 65 percent of women, 18 to 65 years old, agreed that a child sometimes needs a “good hard spanking.” This proportion has declined modestly since 1986 among women, while approval among males, after declining into the early 1990’s, has remained steady.”(1) Let me preface this…

How You Impact Your Child’s Self-Esteem

Self-Esteem is a crucial aspect of being a successful and functional individual. Unfortunately, most of the current parenting practices have pretty negative effects on the child’s self-esteem. I did not have a good self-esteem for a long time. I honestly didn’t know how bad it was until I read Nathaniel Branden’s – How to Raise Your Self-Esteem: The Proven Action-Oriented Approach to Greater Self-Respect and Self-Confidence. This book slapped me in the face with truths that couldn’t be…

The Power Struggle is Real

Let me start by defining what a power struggle is. When you try to impose your will on, or decide for your child without a negotiation or a conversation taking place; and your child is refusing to let you get away with it. Do you find yourself in arguments with your child several times a day? You know, the ones that come out of nowhere and escalate way too fast? Those are power struggles. I have been thinking about how…